Conservative Club - Corby

'All the Pubs, some of the Clubs...', that's what it says at the top of the blog. It's there so I'd never need to risk spontaneously combusting on the threshold of a political venue like the Connie Club. A sensible precaution for a politically agnostic pub blogger like myself, but whaddaya know, Corby's Conservative Club not only welcomed me with open arms, it also doused me in good beer, and generally treated me good. I had a jolly fine afternoon, and escaped without so much as a singed eyebrow!

It's a members club of course, but perhaps there's a special weekend exception for politically neutral folk like myself. I didn't outstay my welcome though, that would be like staying in a graveyard after midnight, flamin' risky at best, drunkenly pressganged to the Tory cause just one possible worst case scenario!

It was on the way to Corby's magnificent Pole Fair (more of which later) that I spotted my chance for pint(s) at The Cons. A Jubilee Saturday afternoon of top local entertainment. On a lorry trailer. In the car park. I figured I could sneak in for a look around during a lengthy Grateful Dead song or something. Certainly too good an opportunity to miss, and what entertainment! Local legends Skirt Patrol have been at the top of my must-see list for months, a very popular turn in Corby it seems.

A Cornish Pasty, yesterday.

Skirt Patrol. Now I know what you're thinking, a rather insensitive name for an inclusive family blog like this. Now I'd agree that Skirt, the preferred cut of beef for traditional Cornish Pasties (right), is an odd name for a band, and it's not as if it's particularly rare (you can get it at Morrisons), so wither the need for a Patrol? It would of course be particularly offensive to the many Vegans and Fruitarians who follow this blog. I say 'no' to 'Vegism' of any kind. But wait!...

A very fine Kilt, quite recently.

Consider where we are for a second! Consider the very Scottish nature of Corby Town, and reconsider your casual, lazy prejudice! A nation well known for it's love of the Kilted Skirt (left), and therefore fair game for a local band to eulogise the traditional garment in song and imagery. You've clearly misunderstood the meaning of the band's name, shame on you! Skirt Patrol, play on...

As it happens the weather was set 'changeable' so the entertainment had been moved indoors. And I missed Skirt Patrol anyway, they'd opened the afternoon shenanigans at around the time I was literally wasting my life quaffing expensive craft beer in Bedford. I cannae be everywhere!

Point Blank and dancefloor early-adopters

I did however catch the magnificent Point Blank (above), a tight five-piece playing popular rock and pop hits of the recent past, and with an uncanny knack of getting Saturday afternoon folk up and dancing when they'd presumably rather be at home snoozing off their Jubilee Trifle. This is of course a very poor joke, because Corby folk have a very strong urge to dance. Dance with the kind of careless, joyous abandon rarely seen in upmarket Gastro Pubs and too-cool Brewery Taps. Corby folk would dance to a faulty Metronome given half a chance, so a band like Point Blank, with a mission statement that states 'Party Band', must absolutely love playing Corby. It's a truly wonderful site to behold and I salute all Corby dancers! I'm more of a toe-tapper and head-nodder myself. Forgive me Corby!

Now I wasn't expecting great beer, and to be fair I didn't get truly great beer. Merely 'really quite nice' beer from a brewery that's new to me (they all are to be fair!), and possibly new to you too, which was quite the Bully-Bonus (ask your grandparents). If there's just one good thing that's come out of the trend for over-chilled, fizzy, craft beer for a tenner, it's that little-known backstreet micro breweries can now showcase quality craft beers like this Shed Head Pale Ale in traditional Corby bars like The Cons. An American Pale Ale (it sez here), brewed in Falkenberg, Sweden (apparently), by the Backyard Brewery (riiight!), and imported for our drinking pleasure by Carlsberg of Northampton (whoever they are). 

Served in an unfeasibly tall glass that immediately put me in fear of a catastrophic elbow assisted tumble-spillage, it seems The Cons has eschewed Corby's favourite John Smiths Smooth in favour of the 'Swedish Option'. Let's hope the ERG don't find out eh! There's also Wainwright Golden Beer for patriots and heritage keg fans. The Shed Head is spicy, malty, and hopped for easy-drinking tastes. So easy drinking in fact that I had a couple, and I'd certainly have another couple if I was in a tight spot. No tumble-spillage neither. Phew!

By now the place was rocking hard, and things were getting quite busy in the Worrall Room (celebrity chef?), so I found a space at the bar, leaned back, and enjoyed the spectacle of the (mostly) Cons Ladies literally owning the dancefloor in the way that only Corby's (mostly) Ladies can. They even coerced the fellas up for a groove, though not me of course...

Jubilee Bunting & Balloons, and assorted Scatter Cushions (not shown) in the Lounge Bar

As Her Majesty looked on, mildly amused I'm sure, Point Blank played their penultimate song and well-worn 'ace card', dropping Britain's new National Anthem to rapturous applause. Anyone who's been to a proper pub or club in the last decade will surely know it by now. I've heard a rather rude version in a backstreet Worcester boozer, a rousing solo rendition in a Gloucestershire British Legion, and the full party singalong in a Corby Pub of course. I think it's a condition of booking for bands in Corby.

Party like it's 2022!

Everywhere you go, it’s the same. Neil Diamond's 'Sweet Caroline' brings the bloody house down. A 100% guaranteed floor-filler with all the hands-in-the-air moves, and a classic call and return singalong chorus with optional smut. We got the clean version, this was, after all, a family event, and besides, The Queen herself was in attendance. How could the band possibly top that! Well, they finished with an anthemic Oasis singalong of course, the Lynard Skynard 'Freebird' of the 21st Century, though without the embarrassing snogging. Thankyou Point Blank, you were amazing, and thankyou the good folk of Corby Cons, because it’s good people (and booze) that make for great afternoons. My carriage awaited, sadly I couldn’t stay for the next band, it was time to bid The Cons a fond farewell.